Melissa Dykes's video: Unemployed Fed UP What it s like to look for a job in America today

Unemployed American? Are you, too, looking in vain for that mythical creature known as a job? Well, welcome to the new majority. Isn't it the most fun you can possibly have with the lights on that doesn't involve noodle salad and a roller coaster? Oh wait. It does. Wasn't it George Carlin that said it's only called 'The American Dream' because you have to be asleep to believe it? One time I got three college degrees but, because we live in a country where our President goes on $100 million vacations and 14 of the 56 vehicles he brings with him happen to be limousines while back home in the country he's supposed to be leading, only 47% of adults even have a full-time job in a country that prints fake paper money and happily trades all of the decent paying jobs for laughably low paying ones, I might as well light all those degrees on fire and dance around them while singing about glow-in-the-dark zombie vampire ninja fish balloon animals. I mean, that's the obvious choice, right? Also, speaking of not asking, don't ask the White House whether or not you should "read too much into" the latest made-up magical pixie dust statistics jobs report because Economic Advisers Council Chairman Alan Krueger will just tell you for like the 50th straight month in a row that "it is important not to read too much into any one monthly report and it is informative to consider each report in the context of other data that are becoming available" — even though the context of that other data with which they are available is each of the other reports in which he has told you that — and by the way, pro tip: they all SUCK. You know, there's just somethin' all kinds of special about a really militant old guy dressed in a pink tutu dancing in a stop motion 90s music video that gets me every time... When life gives you lemons, make lemonade. On the Internet.