Princess fantastic:3's video: s c

I keep everything inside, I try to don't make anyone worried about me, I always do everything on my own. That's the way it always was and it will stay this way. I'm alone. All alone. Even when I try and trust somebody- in the end I will be on my own again anyways...It was never easy for me... I am never happy my self isn't I lost alot of people for no reason.. I loved to be honest with you guys..I tried to end it all, to end all the suffer so many times. Sometimes I wish to knew why everybody leaves me, why everybody treats me like this. I can be a funny person, I can be lovely and I can be a friend for life... but I can't trust anymore... I can'T be happy for more then a few minutes... I don't even know when the last time was when I was truly happy...It's really hard for me... I started this channel... to distract me from depression and my mental illnesses...it tbh it helped out alot... but also I can'T tell you everything I struggle with... it'S to much to deal with and you wouldn'T understand either. idk.... but what I can tell you is that irl I don't have much happyniss and people forgot about me .. most people I knew just left me.... again... And then came back again like taking to me and treating me nice.. and I would always give those people a lot of changes to them and I still do I don't do it to make me feel better.. I do it cause people make mistakes.. all those people how used me pretend to love me and be nice and stuff it breaks me down in pieces... every single day .. I just survive... I hate everything about me idk ... Don't get me wrong... I can laugh I can love... but when I'm alone I feel nothing, I feel dead... and this since years... right now it just got worser...I'm a good friend.. i believe... and I'm always here, I'm here to listen, I'm here to talk... why do I always get treated like that.... Well I'm easy to replace? Or something I guess... and on Y nobody needs me either... and I feel forgotten I write this text here right now... Well anyways I gues I will stop now... besides.... nobody can understand everything anyways and I can'T explain everything....don't know when the day will come where I maybe end this all... I know some people try really hard to keep me happy and even do videos art letters about how much I'm good enough and a lot of things..for me to cheer me up. And you don't know and cant even imagin how grateful I am. I'm speechless everytime. ♥ I just hope that you all are happy that's what I always want.. I never think about myself cause I don't feel my emotions like I don't understand them.. I feel like I am not good enough for anyone I always treat people like I want to be treat.. why can't people just be nice and loving to me irl.. I feel.. not .. special I feel like nothing I feel like .. I'm not here idk Everything has been changing irl.. ever since middle School. End it . I get it life is about changing and stuff.. but what about my feelings? I'm never okay .. I just want to be happy.. I just want those people.. who left me to understand that they are wrong and that they changed.. that's all I can say.. I guess.. I love you guys .. 😭💔 •••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• ♫♥ ♫♥♥♫♥♥♫♪•~ ~۩۞۩ ♫♥ ♦ Nightcore by: me (i slowed it down.) ♪ тнυмвηαıł вy мєнн ♥cнαяαcтєя's/ ★cσłσяıηg: вy Me ★тıмє: 4 hours.. ♣ıηsρıяαтıσηs мysєłƒ! ♥є∂ıтσя: кмρ •••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• ıηsтαɢяαм:follow my Personal account for now.. нαηɢσυтs:ρяıηᴄєss ƒαηтαsтıᴄ:3 (αᴄтıѵє ᴋıηdÁ ∂ısᴄσя∂:@ρяıηєᴄssᴄнєяłʏ •••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••• тнαηᴋ ʏσυ αłł ƒσя sтıłł вєıηɢ αяσυη∂ αη∂ sυρρσятıηɢ мє! тнαηᴋ ʏσυ ƒσя ωαтᴄнıηɢ! ^ω^ łσѵє ʏσυ ɢυʏs sσ мυᴄн - ᴄнєяłʏ ……………………………………………………………………… ♥ρłєαsє ᴄσммєηт, łıᴋє αη∂ sυвsᴄяıвє!!! ♥ ~ тнαηᴋ ʏσᴜ!~ ………………………………………………………………………