Satori Mateu's video: HTB 021: Designing The Life You Value

Description: Many people work hard to find balance and to navigate between family, business and their health. How do you find balance? Is it even possible? Is balance just a myth? Listen as Satori coaches a woman through the struggles of growing her business and find fulfillment behind her work. --Transcript-- You don’t understand Satori, it’s really hard to build a business, to be a good parent, it’s such a struggle to juggle it all, how do I find balance? Hey what’s up my friends, Satori Mateu here and welcome to a Brand new episode of Halfass to Badass. Good morning, good evening, good afternoon wherever you are in listening right now… How do you find balance? Is it even possible? Is there such a thing? I was in a conversation with a client, and she says, “Satori, I get up early every morning to meditate, I make breakfast for the kids, get them ready for school, make sure they have snacks. I have to have everything ready in time so my husband can take them to school. After they leave the house, I put on a load of laundry, clean up the kitchen, vacuum quickly with my handheld because the kids leave a mess after breakfast. I then do my 20 min workout, take a quick shower and by 9am I am at my desk ready to start working on my business. As soon as I get started I’m on a roll and I’m focused, but then I hear the buzzer from the dryer. So I turn that off, throw the clothes in a basket so I can take care of it later. I get text messages from sister. I get notification from Instagram from people I follow. I get private messages on Facebook messenger from a people who are in my entrepreneur group and before I know it, it’s time for lunch and soon after that it’s time to go pick up my kids from school and take them to soccer practice and gymnastics. How am I supposed to get anything done? I feel I start getting momentum and then something comes and pulls me away. I’ll come back to this conversation in just a moment but first… Let me ask you, how do you juggle all the moving parts of your life? Have you ever stopped and looked at what pulls for your attention? What are the disruptions, distractions and demands (which I call the 3D’s) in your life? How do you take command of your focus and create momentum in the midst of whirlwind? Here’s why this important. If you don’t take command of your focus and you let the 3D’s (disruptions, distractions and demands) run your life, your life will be like a ship without a captain and you won’t be able to weather the storm when it really matters. Is this making sense? If you don’t take command of your focus and fill your day with high priority activities that are meaningful to you, your life will be filled with low priority, stress inducing distractions that are meaningless. And who will pay for that? You will. Your kids will. Your spouse. Your clients. Are you following? You’ll feel stressed, overwhelmed, unfulfilled. Which can take the form of overeating, overdrinking, binge watching netflix, taking 20 min bathroom breaks with your phone numbing your brain with other people’s fantasy lives on social media. You may snap at the wrong people. You won’t be present in your key relationships, are you with me? And that’s just me scratching the surface of the consequences. Back to my conversation with my client… I say to her, “I understand you’re not getting the momentum you want. You’re not moving fast enough and you’re working hard to navigate all the parts of your life, right? Your family, your business, you meditate to take care of your-self. I get it. It’s now always easy. But let me ask you, Who’s life are you living?” “She’s like what do you mean?” “Well, who designed this life? Whose path is this? She got quiet for a moment… “I don’t know. Haven’t thought that.” “I understand, most people don’t. Is it ok if I share some life design strategies with you?” And so we started talking about it and the more we talked about she realized how non-consious, how undeliberate she was living. And she was blown away, the more she saw how she was living according to automatic social norms she had been conditioned to live by. Even though she was an entrepreneur growing her own business. She wasn’t working 9-5 for someone else, but still stuck in unconscious patterns of thinking, feeling and behaving. In other words, habits she had stopped paying attention to a long time ago. When we started looking at her patterns I asked her, “You told me earlier that you feel frustrated when you get messages and feel like you have to answer them right away. What would you have to believe in order to feel this way, what are your thoughts?” “That if I don’t answer right away, I’m rude. Disrespectful. And… That they’ll be upset with me.” “Aha, and how does that make you feel…?” “Even more...