Shu's video: Am I allowed to call myself English shorts

Am I “allowed” to call myself English? I’m not white and despite being born and bred in England my entire life, I’ve always been hesitant to call myself English. From a young age, I waitressed at my parent’s restaurant and without fail, a customer would inevitably stop me to comment “But how is your English SO good? It’s nearly better than mine!” I explain England is the only place I’ve ever lived and the place I call home, but the words always gloss over them. Years later, I went on a trip to the Isle of Wight and was told, “I got nervous when I saw your name but as soon as I heard your accent, why, you’re one of us!” I remember feeling so conflicted: a contrast between feeling guilty yet relieved for my younger self to be accepted by the people who would usually be quick to deny that I too, like them, belonged. But I was also angry at having to dissect my entire three decades of existence in England - yet still feel scared to call myself English in front of them. Back to the present day, I no longer need (nor crave) the approval from strangers. I am where I say I’m from. I’m proud to be British-born Chinese. I celebrate the dualities that come with these cultural identities, and if the same people were to question me again now, without hesitation I would reply: Yes, I’m ethnically Chinese. Yes, I’m a woman of colour born and raised here. And yes, England is my home.